wanderlust, or, the gods must be crazy
in other news of things i want but can't have, there is this cottage currently for rent in santa cruz. for the low low price of $1325 a month, including utilities.
while some people seem dismayed by all the rain in austin lately, i have to say, i feel like the forces of nature are conspiring to make me really not want to leave. already, i have such a feeling of sentimentality every moment i am out of my apartment and driving or walking around town, hanging out with people, that i get choked up at times. but by screwing around with the hot austin summer, the gods have taken the ONE thing that bothers me most about living here and made it almost forgettable. just sort of thrown it to the side like heat? misery? are you
sure you're thinking about
this austin?
Labels: cali
that damn grass
lately i've been thinking a lot about what i need to have when i start grad school. i know that it's not imperative that i have every lens i could ever use or the $2500 digital camera that i want, but it seems like every time i blink, i'm seeing a photo taken by a nikon camera and thinking goddamn i want my pictures to look like that. and here's the thing. i made really nice photos with my little 1972 manual canon. i loved using it, i didn't have a problem having to focus manually and rewind it myself. but ever since i got my 20d i feel Dumb. that's right, with a capital D.
to me, the digital world has sapped my creativity. whereas i should have been freed by the widening of opportunity you get with one camera that can shoot at all different film speeds and different conditions, i felt like it took away my choices, my ability to adapt. so now i'm torn between trying to really *figure out* my camera and just wanting to go back to film. which i love. which i can never replace. it's like getting a letter instead of an email. there's just something to be said for having a hard, tangible record of someone's existence. to know what went into the record of communication, the thoughts behind it. i don't think i could ever give that up.
Labels: photo
duly noted
i don't think i ever meant to stop writing in this blog back in the day. i had started a livejournal because i knew so many other people on it and it seemed like a good idea. but i feel like the run has come to an end and i'm ready to get back to writing for me instead of as a competition for who can be the wittiest or rack up the most comments. going back and reading the entries on here from more than two years ago is interesting because i can see that i was in the same space mentally, but it just took me that long to get my shit together and figure out where to go from there. so here i am, going.
